Sunday, March 14, 2010
i guess i just been too lazy to blog nowadays with now life seems like a wheel months
ago the beat was born giving new look at life
part of my dream has finally came true
i got a crew now who i know has my back and i have
theirs but like i said life is like a wheel karma
flows it through it hmmm what is really happening
outside is jsut how it is i know this does not make sense
to most but i just saying whats in my mind well
here is an update a few of my dreams has come true
now i need to work on the rest getting through ns and all
i have the direction now i have to keep moving towards it
love is back in my life and i am getting better in the mind department
jsut afew more adjustments and it will be ok for now
but i will take things one at a time for now life is
wheel and i guess it will happen when ur patient with it
like the wheel sometimes ur up and other times ur down
we have to be patient with what is going to happen
or has happened this is my thoughs and a mind which is crazy
and of sort.........
ZnL@rif blogged at 5:40 PM
Saturday, September 05, 2009
to tell the truth i actually feel very lost very dejected in life i donnoe where i stand in my love life single or just loved? or some ask me why smoke but do they really understand what is happening in my mind?how really confused i am maybe i am jsut running away from reality?running from the fact that life is just not that easy as i though it was 10years ago i just feel incomplete very incomplete very dead and empty i pray everynight for even a small point to show me wherei should be goinwhich direction should i be moving?oh lord i lean on u for this i have given u my all i dont noe what to do anymore nicotine and the alcohol can do just that much to help me forget all of this pain and suffering from my mind and the burdened heart i lean to u to show me which one and where for me to go.....
ZnL@rif blogged at 3:59 AM
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
looking at the dark sky as the hours goes by noticing a lonely star just shining on its own really sometimes just tells me that somewhere out there is another person looking at that same star look at its beauty in the darkness although surrounded by all the darkness within its reach it still shine through just like how much this world is changing for the better or worst we us as people as individuals just have to shine through it shine like that lone star shine through all the troubles you have and look foward to what ur goin to face with a shine and hope....
ZnL@rif blogged at 4:15 AM
Thursday, April 02, 2009
as the days and nights goes as the days turns to weeks and weeks turn to monthsjust realising how defining it is to be alone is so natural to me now it is so usual just waking up in the morning alone no one there to walk up to seems so indifferent to me now i never did took another relationship with another half seriously after ASMbut there is something inside that just wants to love again that just wants to have that feeling of having someone close to me that side sometimes just makes me feel crazymakes me wanting to kill myself slowly with nicotineand just drink my liver to death but then there is the other side of methat is in peace that i can finally and slowly be myselfon the streets i use to try not be different but now i dont care i just do what i think is rightwalking around aimlessly not caring what others think that is who i really am that is who i will always be that is the real me........
ZnL@rif blogged at 1:32 AM
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
was listening to a few songs i would never though i would ever listen to in my life a song that really showed how empty my life really is now sometimes i wonder what am i reallydoing walking around like a zombie just listening to music hanging out alone i wonder what is that missing piece that i am looking for what is making my life feel so restless feel so hollow and empty what is that missing piece of the puzzle 2009 is so brand new now maybe i just donnoe what to expect anymore as anything is possible 2008 has come and gone leaveing a part of me in a very big mess and a lot of unexplained happenings in my life maybe this is gods way of saying i have much more ot learn much more to fight for and much more to care for but what is it? Maybe this is my path for 2009 finding the new meanings in life the new treasures in my life i never did got the chance to say good bye to 2008 in a proper way maybe it is time i do ........
ZnL@rif blogged at 5:54 PM
Friday, December 12, 2008
sometimes being alone in the darkness really helps to show you really ar what ur really here to do in life cause maybe i am sometimes confused who i really am sometimes i need that boost to help me remember who i am what i can really do in my life what i really wantwhat i really need in life for sometimes in the darkness light will always shine even abit for this is how life is this is how life will become this is how life will change too
ZnL@rif blogged at 1:41 PM
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
some people have inner demons that they wont ever know or realiseit seems like i am blessed that i know i have inner demons of my own and i realisei have to get rid of them walking through that old past that old neighbourhood reminded me how much life has pass how much experinces i had gone throughlooking back at all of it really can bring tears to my eyeslaughter to my heart and smile to my face the thing i know i should'nt have donethe things i was force to do learning how to survive how to fight and how to adapton the streets looking back at all though memories really got me to think of what has happened this past year from a great january to a very bad end on junebut it was really all a blessing in disguise i lost one love i found christi found friends who really do care and i found a new meaning to life thank you all thank you lord
ZnL@rif blogged at 10:10 PM
